Wednesday, 11 January 2012

Peter Pan wants to learn the piano

by PhantomSeptember @ dA
Here, as promised, is my first offering of output from the creative writing workshop at Waterstones! In the first exercise we were instructed to show our character about to break/give up on their new year's resolution. Unfortunately I was pretty engrossed in setting the scene, so I never got around to Peter walking away. Still, I had a lot of fun coming up with the circumstances that lead to his desire, writing children again, and figuring out where in Neverland you find a piano in the first place!
'What's stopping you, Peter? The ship is ours, we can do whatever we like!'
Peter hovered at the edge of the cliff, chewing his lip as he stared at the dark tangle of ropes and sails silhouetted against the rapidly setting sun.
'Come on, you're not afraid of the pirates coming back are you?'
A chorus of badly-held back guffaws broke out amongst the Lost Boys, and a rogue elbow jabbed into Peter's thigh, startling him into tumbling over the precipice.
He fell several feet, then, recovering from the shock, shot back upwards with an angry roar.
'I ought to teach you all a lesson on respecting your leader! And on the correct behaviour for secret missions and stakeouts!' he bellowed, with such force behind his words he spat a shower of fairy dust over the closest boys. They were deadly silent, and stared up at their leader in a mixture of shock and fear at his sudden mood swing.
'We...we was only 'aving a laugh,' came the timid voice of Tootles from near the back. Peter scowled and turned his gaze back towards the Jolly Roger.
'Quiet, all of you; I'm thinking,' he ordered.
Inside Captain Hook's cabin stood the object of his desire, a vision of promise in ebony and ivory! Whenever the Lost Boys and Pirates had a skirmish on the ship, Peter took a second to retreat from battle and push his nose against the glass of the cabin window, just to stare in awe at the instrument.
Ever since that fateful flight to London on Christmas Eve night, when he had peeked into a house and seen a young boy playing carols for his family, he had been enamoured with the piano. He had watched the parents smile and turn the pages of the music, encouraging their son in between verses of 'Hark! The Herald Angels Sing,' and instantly felt a stab of jealousy. And if that scrawny little somebody could do it, then the great Peter Pan would have no trouble!

Well...I think you can see where this might be going. I thought that, if I had finished it, the reason Peter would walk away from his resolution would be because he realised he had no parents to play for or to encourage him, and he would no longer see the point. It's quite sad really...

It has been a long time since I wrote children (or for children,) but as I would some day like to return to that, any feedback on the characterisation or dialogue would be very welcome!

You can read 'Snow White wins the lottery' here!


  1. Eee~ I want to read more! From what I remember of Peter, I think you've got him down pretty well. Everything flows together nicely, and I think it would be a wonderful children's story.

    1. Thank you! I don't plan on finishing these particular fairy tale re-writes because I have quite a lot of other stories on the go that I'd like to finish and edit, but I'm so pleased you like it!! xxx